A sadness in my heart

How do you deal with a sadness that is becoming hard to hold in your heart? What happens when the person you love the most is gone? You cannot see into their eyes.. their simple touch is gone. Their presence is away and you are left with memories and feelings. There are pictures... gifts... items... memories. But how long do memories last? As long as the person decides? Or forever?

There is a sadness in my heart that I can no longer hold in.. I miss you Jared. I have so much inside me that I cannot type fast enought to express it. You wont read this.. maybe not for fa while. BUt I want to say that I love you. You made me change. And without you now I feel as if I am falling apart..

How can I reach you when you seem so far away? Today it rained here. And my heart is now raining with the sky. Raining tears of sadness and despare that I do not have you here.

What will time hold? IF only I could just know. But you have to just take that risk right? I look at the moon and remember what we said. Are you listening? Am i? Heaven help me so I can be strong.